Accepting Life’s Unexpected Turns

It wasn’t until the last decade or so that I ever had any medical challenges. While I was grateful for my good health, I also assumed that it would always be that way for me. Yet, in the years following a mystery diagnosis (I say mystery because even the doctors’ notes reveal that they weren’t sure what was going on), I’ve had two separate and unrelated cancer diagnoses along with other issues that have seemingly come out of nowhere. It appears that my life of cruising with good health had come to an end, if I only look at the last decade.

At some points during this journey, I have resisted and ignored doctor’s instructions, I’ve made up stories of how my life is doomed, and I have felt defeated by not feeling well for so long. Yet, I’m also learning to accept change and the many phases of transformation. In the fall of 2020, I was so excited to reach the end of my five-year treatment and diagnosis period after being diagnosed with colon cancer. Then, one month prior to being released by the doctors, I was diagnosed with breast cancer and now face another five to 10-year treatment and observation plan. I was so incredibly disappointed with that news, and it took me a while to accept this new twist in my journey to wellness.

I’ve learning many things throughout these experiences. One of the important lessons is related to Acceptance. Accepting one’s current circumstances is not giving up on one’s desires and dreams. It is a necessary step in understanding the truth of where I stand at any given moment. It is embracing the present, with its range of what I have the opportunity to choose as good or bad. Acceptance is not surrendering. It is understanding where I am in this moment.

There were also times when I’ve blamed myself for my diagnoses despite there being no evidence that I took actions to or made poor decisions that directly led to them. I’ve learned that Acceptance also involves forgiveness. Forgiveness is a deliberate, intentional decision to release feelings of resentment towards a person or situation that has caused you harm. While it can be easy to forgive others, it may be more challenging to forgive oneself. In accepting my present circumstances, I also empower myself to make intentional choices moving forward. Being unkind to myself is not in any way supportive of moving forward on my health journey. In fact, it will only tie me more to the past, to thoughts and ideas of things that cannot be undone.

When we fight against what is present, we only create blockages in our life that prevent us from appreciating what is currently great about our lives. Non-acceptance also keeps us from fully loving every aspect of ourselves without judgement.  Each part of our journey is something that supports our growth and transformation over our lifetime. We can choose to make our journey even more beautiful, with all of its twists and turns, if we embrace acceptance and ourselves every day.